Thursday, July 3, 2008

Rasta La Vista, Baby

I do believe that these are the worst-looking hubs I've ever seen in my life.


These LIMITED EDITION Profile Mini hubs are called "Rasta", but look more like something you'd buy at Party Time. Are they supposed to be covered in streamers? Were they designed by a four-year old? Hell, they look more Mardi Gras than Rastafari. Regardless, they're the worst-looking (allegedly) Rasta-themed bike part ever, and that's saying a lot given what there's been, both in mountain:

• Chris King headsets:


Salsa skewers:


• Paul derailleurs:



(When it comes to pure unadulterated '90s disgustingness, nothing beats mountain bike parts.)



And BMX:


• Demolition pedals (I always thought they should have done a Neapolitan version):


• Fit DLR (and DLD) stem:



And, my favorite of all, the 10-year-old Rigid street frame, a Nate Wessel creation (as was the Demolition pedal 'colorway', actually). I looked all over the internet for photos and couldn't find any, so I decided to shoot the spread straight out of Ride (June/July '98). You might even be able to read it:


(Nice sprocket, Nate.)

I really wish I had a scanner—maybe I should buy one of those "limited edition" hubsets and flip 'em on eBay. Too bad I don't think I'd make a profit. I'd be better off re-selling these, 'cause those hubs are gonna be a dog. Since they're both terrible AND late.

(I don't even want to get into how silly it is to run Rasta parts on your bike if you don't at least have a basic understanding of Rastafari. It's not all just about smoking weed and listening to Bob Marley. That said, I'm gonna get a Star of David sprocket to show my love for The Fiddler on the Roof and Uzis.)


EDIT: How did I miss this? Jersey Mike Taylor must have been a fan of that Rigid:



••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••


I haven't even watched all their videos yet, but Portland's Your Inn is my new favorite BMX crew. Company. Whatever. Anyone co-sponsored by a local vodka distillery is A-1 by me. Next time I'm in the PDX, I'm paying a visit.

40 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have never seen in person or otherwise a Rasta riding a BMX. I have to be missing something. This hub's a close second worst I reckon
http://www.coalitionbmx.com/blog/archives/camowheelclose-thumb.JPG

And the New Deal Vodka guys should come to the UK with the riders, unemployment benefit is known as "New Deal" http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Employment/index.htm?cids=Google_PPC&cre=Employment
it could provide some interesting mixups.

Russ said...

I want to see someone lace those Profile hubs up with yellow, red and green spokes to one gold rim and one green rim, then run red tires.

Yes, that Coalition hub is awful. And Profile did a green/brown "camo" that looked like a fingerpainting accident.

I always thought if any BMXers were going to be sponsored by a vodka distillery, it would be in Russia.

Stephen said...

In Soviet Russia, BMX sponsors vodka!

My girlfriend is gonna love this update. She was all kinds of Rasta for years, and still sort of believes some of the "Jah" stuff.

BMX spins into odd globs of pretentiousness...

Anonymous said...

I'm surprised they haven't been yet. I enjoyed this vid from Russia
http://www.bmxonline.com/article.jsp?ID=1000053467&type=features

from these guys
http://www.vimeo.com/platypusfilms

Anonymous said...

those hubs are sweet. uzis are fuckin sweet too.

Anonymous said...

people just dont buy the profile splatter paint jobs

owner of the local bmx shop says he is stuck with everything splattery that profile have made, people dont ask for it and dont buy it, it looks like crap
its so bad that profile said they could get a refund if they dont sell

Russ said...

They should sell them with a complimentary can of EZ-OFF.

Anonymous said...

Isn't there some white guy that was in one of the magazines recently who was Rastafarian? I remember thinking it was strange, I didn't think you could be both of those things at the same time.

Anonymous said...

Russel Barrone. His bike is Rasta free though.

Russ said...

Russ Barone. Rides for Fit. While I'd guess most Rastafari are black, race isn't a prereq.

Anonymous said...

Racist!

Anonymous said...

Racist!

Anonymous said...

echo

Smitty said...

In my best Jim Gaffigan alter-ego voice, "Hey, I happen to like my Rasta pedals, mister!" Those hubs are a swing-and-a-miss, most of the MTB parts pictured are similarly gross. But I like the rasta pedals, and I happen to think that some Bullseye hubs done in Rasta colors would look OK. To each his own.

Russ said...

I might not have even commented if the Profile hubs followed a Bullseye-like color scheme. They would have still been outdated, but at least they wouldn't have been brain-boilingly ugly.

Anonymous said...

While being Black isn't a prerequisite for being Rasta, being a White guy in a religion that counts Marcus Garvey as a profit and is based in large part around the struggle of Black people to overcome oppression at the hands of White people is, well, odd.

But, there's the pot thing...

Anonymous said...

as pathetic as it is we (Albe's) sell absolutely shit loads of all the Profile splatter/limited hubs. at first we weren't into it but the whole demand & supply thing took over, people called asking if we had them so we brought them in. maybe we sell so many because we're the only ones lame enough to stock them? could be.

Fuck BMX. said...

make that money!

Anonymous said...

I'm pretty sure Nate Wessel doesn't practice Rastafari. He doesn't even smoke weed! So I guess the only rasta connection is because of the dreadlocks?

Anonymous said...

there's a lot of shit...and i truly mean SHIT on the market that we could sell but won't. i could Duckworth this joint in a heartbeat and fill it to the rafters with pink Drive Lite forks and Industry Stroker cranks but i have to live with myself after i lock the doors at night. there's a big difference between dorky colors & paying the electric bill and getting eleven million in stock options when you sell the place. and Stephen...we sold thousands of Casket stems and had we heard complaints about them we would have pulled the plug on 'em just like we did on the first generation of Demolition Medial cranks. ruthless? hardly. need to eat? you bet. way to keep me in check, though. (now someone can dig up somethine amazingly dumb that we sold and throw it in my face...go ahead, i can take it)

Stephen said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA

And this is why I order from Albes.

Sometimes I go and look at my ordering history on the website and wonder how many boxes premium mac and cheese I have helped the employees there buy...

Russ said...

^^ That's what I'm talking about.

At least there's a good hub underneath the heinous anodizing.

Anonymous said...

Ewww ewww ewww. I think the Fit stem looks even worse, myself. I like the ras cats, though.

- BUB

Anonymous said...

Todd creeps me out in real life. Something about him. I dig him though.

Anonymous said...

I wonder how many Rasta's would actually consider Russ for real.

He should go back to eating pasta and a spicey meatballs.

Anonymous said...

creepy? me? naw...but the day they find out where i've buried all the bodies you're gonna be stoked when you get to say "I KNEW IT!"

Anonymous said...

how long have you had the Dan's chip on your shoulder? 20 years now?

Aaron said...

I had no idea what the backstory was behind the Rasta movement, weird. Crazy to think that 2400 years after the last bit of the Old Testament was written people are still pulling messiahs out of it.

Probably a rabbit trail there....

The hubs are ugly.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous 4:14...if you're refering to the "Dan's Chip" on my shoulder then i'd have to say it was either the 2nd or 3rd time they threatened Albe's with legal action...or maybe it was right after they had me taken into custody at a BMX race...always based on nothing at all. yep, that sort of thing can leave you feeling a little bitter, business rival or not. and believe me, the last thing i want is to be more like that place and/or Dan Duckworth.

Anonymous said...

psh. i have some of them there orange and grey splatters...i got them from a deal, because i ride with the profile dudes. not really, but my local shop owner used to be on the profile team before he opened the shop. you can make them look good if they're not rasta. rasta's becoming a "trend" religion. imo.

Anonymous said...

christianity is a trend.

Russ said...

I can't believe no one even mentioned the Rigid and its uncircumcised Taj seatstay junction. I was so psyched on that bike when I first saw the article.

Anonymous said...

It's basically a powerlite. Or were the powerlites rigids?

Anonymous said...

Apparently God (not sure which one though, possibly Jah) is totally fine with BMX

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AnilGlrKQluvsL6eyRnJ0Azsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20080627071642AASaRg3

Anonymous said...

"Your Inn"...

"Urine"...

Haha, how clever.

Anonymous said...

Hey man It's Brendan from Your Inn, totally hit me up if your comin through PDX, come chill at the Penny Mansion and ride the quarterpipe in the driveway. ill be in NY in August and hopefully bringing some bottles of NEW DEAL VODKA for the ride and hopefully to the Belmar comp as well. I dont know who posted that shit up top either.

Russ said...

Awesome.

Teddy Parker said...

One love man. Couldn't agree more Rastafarian is a way of life, not a trend. It's too bad people get that twisted...

Anonymous said...

What are you so bitter about that you have to go on rantings about this absolutely inconsequential crap?
Seeing a person running rasta colored shit shouldn't trigger thoughts like " is this a true Rastafarian follower ? I question his commitment to the faith he claim to follow by running those bright colored things that I consider to be very much ugly"
Things evolve and influence other things, rasta colors are just some colors, that associate with certain time, people, music and places, with what ever people choose to associate it with, not just religion as you seem to believe.
Now in fear of being miss judged i'll say that i run no rasta colored parts or items of clothing, just not to sound defensive.
I wanna know what motivates you to initiate such in depth analysis of subjects so trivial that a reasonable being wouldn't bother occupying their head with for a second. Not to mention form and spread opinions about the mentioned.
Your letting you journalism skills go to waist with these pointless rumblings. Ugly hub aren't gonna make or break anything, why not let people do their shit even if you do think its dumb?
Even assuming worst case scenario what consequence so terrible could result from some misinformed potheads with questionable taste and a neck for cliches? After all, in the natural order of things attention is the last thing you wanna give to something you think is dumb.

Anonymous said...

Oh man, I used to lust after that Rigid frame. That article was in the Ride with Josh Heino riding vert on the cover, right Russ? I have many a memory of reading about it over and over, and dreaming about what it would be like when I finally got it. I didn't ever actually get it of course (plus I think they probably only made like, 12 anyway), but that frame will always have a special place in my heart, right next to the El Jefe, Sluggo, S.O.B, and Holmes.