Smilin' is Cheesin'

Hm, I wonder if éclat's still mad at me? I never did hear from Tunney after the Great Cheese Incident (unless he authored the exceptionally petty "comeback" on the éclat site), and we used to e-mail on a semi-regular basis, too. Shame. And to think I was gonna buy his rookie card.

Anyway, éclat—the company with the most iconic logo in BMX—released a couple of new parts last week that are worth taking a closer look at. We'll start with this new biodegradable combination tube sealant and grip installer:


Oh, I'm just kidding. You guys need to relax if you're gonna make it to your first anniversary.

But éclat really did put out a few new products. The first is an unnamed stem. It's crazy, because the plate goes on the FRONT, hence the term "front-load." I know, hard to imagine, right? Maybe you'd get a better idea of what I mean if you looked at a photo:

Does it make more sense now? (Seems sort of strange that éclat would start with a frontload when everything's heading back topload. Frontload stems made a lot more sense when people were running low, narrow bars—anyone who ran Castillos and a DK stem could attest to that. They do have a Sean Burns topload in the works, though.) Note the smaller bolts on the face (is this a better option than hollow 6mm bolts?) and the iconic logo on the side.

The niftiest feature (yes, I'm being serious for a moment) is found on the back, which is cut in an "s" shape:


This allows more threading to catch without having to set the bolt heads a half-inch into the stem. Judging from the text (it's referred to as "the proven snake gap") I take it this has been done before, but I guess I ain't noticed. (Unless "the proven snake gap" is actually just something Jimmy Levan jumped over recently.) As for the pertinent measurements, 49.5 mm, 9.5 ounces. And it's nowhere near as terrifying looking as some sub-10 stems. In fact, it's quite aesthetically pleasing. Of course that's just because they removed material from the bottom instead of the sides. And, in the immortal words of Twisted Sister, "what you don't know sure can hurt you, what you can't see makes you scream."

Meh, the seat can wait 'til tomorrow.

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Hey, Tierra V2. I'm amused that the "long" rear end version is 13.65". Don't hurt yourselves.

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According to James Foster, his new frame (which was discussed earlier) "completely obliterates every other bike in the universe" and "has the best geometry of any bike I’ve ridden." Well, that's that, then. Guess I can close up shop.

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No Control

If this were a Friday quiz, which it isn't, I suppose this would be the essay question:

The primary reasoning I've heard behind people running bigger and bigger bars is this: "It gives you more control." Now personally, I think this is true up to a point. Back in the good old days of 19" Castillo Bars, when men were men and those men slid their grips all the way to the crossbar, wider bars were definitely a step in the right direction. The thing is—to me—things have now gone way too far the other way. If you're an 85-pound kid with shoulders the size of the average house sparrow's, a pair of 30" wide bars is probably going to give you less control than a pair of 25" wide ones.

But that's not even my point.

My point is this. If the reasoning for wider bars is "more control," why do many people with super-wide bars also have a) no brakes, b) super-short rear ends, and c) vestigal seats? Brakes give you more control. Longer rear ends (arguably) give you more control. And a seat raised to a reasonable height absolutely gives you more control.

So my question is this:

If you run super-wide bars because they give you "more control," why do you intentionally set up the rest of your bike to give you less?

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I picked up the current copy of Road Bike Action this week to accompany me on a train ride, and less than 20 pages in I found the most amazing bike part in the history of history. You know all that stuff I've said about pointless BMX parts? This takes the cake, eats it, then shits it on my head and eats it again.

I present to you the $1,600 carbon/ti brakeset.

Unbelievable. But hey, at least you get free shipping.

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*EDIT* Changed the title to what it should have been in the first place. Sorry, Brett and Greg, it won't happen again. (Why can't I remember what video used this? I remember Hallman riding to Bad Religion in a Standard video, but I think it was a different song. Stupid faulty memory.)

Ti, Die

There's isn't much that I don't understand about KHE's prototype titanium flatland frame. Honestly, I only have one question:

Why?

Here's KHE's explanation (which can be found by following the link above): "We'll build up a bike with all the lightweight parts we can find in our warehouse to see how far we can push the limits. How light can a serious bike become? You can check out the bike at the next Eurobike for sure."

Interesting. Stupid, but interesting. Look, titanium is a great material to make bike frames from. According to roadies and hardtail MTB types, it has a ride quality that can't be duplicated with steel or aluminum or carbon fiber. It's lightweight, corrosion-resistant, and super resilient. Of course it's also difficult to work with (just ask Eastern) and expensive as hell, which is how you wind up with things like a $3,200 road frame and a $9,000 commuter bike. Companies offer cheaper titanium, but you run the risk of getting a frame made from melted-down MIGs and old Chernobyl core rods.

BMX bikes, though? Not so much. Taj had someone fabricate a titanium Barcode and he hated it because it was so flexy (scroll about 2/3 of the way down). And you don't see those ti Grim Reapers advertised in Dan's anymore.

And I love that KHE asks "how far we can push the limits," like they may find some magical parts in their warehouse that will allow them to build a six-pound complete bike. If the ti frame weighs 2.16 pounds, and their top-of-the-line complete flat bike weighs in at 17.2 pounds (and costs $1,900), a complete built with the ti frame should weigh roughly two pounds less than that. That is, unless they decide to drill a bunch of holes in everything just to show off and make it even less rideable than it is already.

Which leads one to ponder, what exactly constitutes a serious bike? Flatland bikes may not have to stand up to 20-stair drops to flat, but they take a lot of abuse that a "regular" BMX bike never will, being pulled and spun and tweaked in multiple directions at once. Don't believe me? Check out this bike I shot at a jam this summer:


So even if you could build a 15-pound flatland bike (that would retail for roughly $3,000, of course), what's the point if it would just twist up like a pretzel the second a serious rider put it through its paces? Why not try and make a lightweight frame out of aluminum (already been done, I know) or some sort of carbon composite? Titanium? We've been down that road before. It's going to be light. It's going to be expensive. And it's going to suck.

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And now for something completely different.

The Road and The Damned

Hola, amigos and anonymouses. Been a long time. But I gave Monday to MLK (and roughly 12 hours of NBA basketball) and yesterday to Obama (although I could have done without pretty much everything after his speech. I'm still having trouble believing that Nick freaking Cannon DJed the "Neighborhood Ball." Maybe we're not out of the woods yet.)

Appreciate all the commentary (both good and bad) on Project: Complete. Right now I'm leaning heavily towards the FBM Marauder BL. Basically, I want a complete that's similar to what I'm riding now—brakeless, four pegs, decent standover, black—so I can run it straight out of the box. And the 20.5" frame shouldn't bother me much—I had an old 20.5" Stricker a while back, and other than it's being a tank, I liked it a lot. The only other bike still in the running is the Fit STR-3, but from what I can tell I think the FBM's a little bit taller. As for the other contenders, well:

KINK LIBERTY — Pretty much the same as the Marauder, and when it comes down to it I'd rather try the FBM.

GIANT METHOD TEAM — The original idea was to just get a Giant and make it my main bike. Ride a BMX bike from the biggest manufacturer in the world (it shouldn't make a difference, really—BMX geometry isn't guarded like the KFC secret recipe). But the Method Team comes with so many aftermarket parts that it just didn't seem like it would be that interesting to write about. Plus, I'd have to lose the brake and put on four pegs. Too much like work. I still like the idea of riding a Giant, though. Maybe for the next bike after.

STOLEN SINNER — Too many horror stories from too many people. And I don't have health insurance.

VERDE RADIA — A few things appealed. Like, would a mostly high-tensile steel frame hold up? And would the super-low fixed Pivotal seat drive me completely insane? I figure the answer to the second question was "absolutely," so out went that.

WTP ENVY — Too expensive. And again, too many aftermarket parts. It would more or less be a test of the éclat gruppo, and it seems like all that stuff works just fine. I'm not Sean Burns or Chester Blacksmith.

EASTERN... WHATEVER — I'd rather push a Huffy than ride an Eastern.

KHE — I'm not a 12-year-old girl.

HARO/PREMIUM — Didn't really look into it all that much. Ditto for any other company I'm forgetting.

So that's that. I'll take suggestions for the rest of the week, and maybe the beginning of next week, but then I want to buy something and get this thing off the ground. Hopefully it'll get above freezing.

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Hey, wow, Verde's forks have built-in bearing races. Like, um, Odyssey's did a year and a half ago.

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I'm saving this for tomorrow.

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Immodest Proposal?

So, I've been giving some more thought to this whole Project: Complete I talked about yesterday. And after looking at it in the light of day following a good night's sleep, I'm not sure whether it's even a good idea. For me, at least. And for a number of reasons.

I guess the main one is that I already know the answer to the big question: Of course a complete will be good enough for me. It's like asking whether I could play basketball in a pair of $40 Converse instead of Air Jordans. Of course I could. I'm not a professional. I'm not even a has-been. I'm more like a never-was. I ride for fun. I don't Luc-E kinked ledges, I don't ride Posh, and the next flair I do will be my first. Would it be weird getting used to an entirely new bike? Sure, especially if it was shorter than what I'm used to. But I have no doubt that I would get used to it.

Then again, maybe that's reason enough to do it? It'll be a good way to see—at least for me—how many choices are just made because there are choices, and whether there are any that are truly important. (I'm not talking about things like hardened steel pegs over slidy aluminum ones—I'm talking minute differences in toptube length and handlebar sweep/width and type of grips and tires). If someone replaced your 20.6" or 20.75" frame with a 20.5" tomorrow, would you even notice? And assuming you did, how long would it take you to get used to the change? How many of the choices that you agonize over are entirely insignificant?

Again, I'm pretty sure I know the answer. The average rider—not referring to skill level here—chooses parts primarily by reputation and image. The questions, in no particular order, are "will this hold up?," "how much does this cost?," and "what will people think when they see me running/rocking this?" That last might be the most important, which is why BMX parts are marketed more like limited-edition sneakers or high-end denim than, you know, bike parts. Somehow I think Lance Armstrong worries more about whether his bars fit than whether they're cool or not (although he did almost break Twitter asking whether he should run black or yellow hoods).

Sometimes I think skateboarding got it right. They picked a size and a shape and ran with it. Only the graphics change. Maybe all the BMX companies should get together, decide on a headtube angle, a seattube angle, a bottom bracket standard (!), a pair of chainstay lengths and three toptube sizes. Pick some tubing, and place a huge order with Giant. All individual companies would have to do is come up with names, pick "colorways" and design sticker sets. One massive order would cut prices, and anyone would be able to ride any company's frame. Simple, right?

I realize this runs counter to lots of things I've said before. That's just how I roll.

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As for the purveyance of said bicycle, I've done a lot of thinking on that, too. (Helped along by anonymous, no doubt.) And I think I absolutely have to buy it. That way I'm not beholden to anyone, and there's no chance of getting a ringer: "Wait, why does this $500 Kink complete weigh 22 pounds?" Still, I'm not sure what to get, and suggestions are still welcome. (Verde? FBM? WTP? MirraCo? Giant? Kink?) I'd post a poll, but a) I don't have a clue how to do it, and b) I don't have enough of a readership. Not that I'm not thankful for each and every one of you. Well, except anonymous. You're a dick.

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A Modest Proposal

BMXfeed was down for a couple of hours today and I almost lost my mind. I don't do RSS feeds—I don't even know how to do RSS feeds—so BMXfeed is my connection to the rest of the BMX internet universe. The umbilical cord that keeps me fed. Wonderful, amazing, exciting news like this. Yes, Ali Whitton is getting a new signature frame from Macneil. No, I don't know why. (Here's what I really don't get: If the market is truly being driven primarily by kids, how many of them are eager to ride the same frame as Alistair Whitton?)

But there was something else I wanted to talk about today, something that has nothing to do with BMXfeed, or any sort of BMX news.

The weather outside is frightful. My faithful BMX bike has been parked for some time. And, as is usually the case when I'm not riding, thoughts have turned to a new bike. I've considered many possibilities—a Sunday, a Barcode, maybe even an STA. But I think I have a better idea than any of those.

What I want is a complete bike. Preferably something 20.75" or 21", but I think I could handle a 20.5". I'm thinking of an FBM Marauder or a Kink Liberty or a Fit STR Signature or—best of all—a Giant Method Team. I would change nothing (well, unless I got a Giant, in which case I would remove the brakes and add four pegs). I wouldn't cut the bars or the steerer tube, wouldn't change the grips or the pedals or the tires. I'd even leave the reflectors in the spokes and the "THIS BIKE IS ONLY BUILT FOR RIDING SLOWLY ON THE SIDEWALK" sticker on the toptube. I would only replace parts when they broke, and would more or less turn it into a long-term test.

You always read in magazine bike tests that "[Rider X] could do everything on [bike Y] that he could do on his regular bike" or that "[Rider Y] liked the [bike X] just as much as his [bike W]." Well, what if said bike became Rider X's regular bike? How good are these completes really? Can a $500 (or $800) complete compare to a $1,500 custom build? And, if so, what's the point of assembling a bike piece-by-piece?

I admit, I may have to go through hardships. Like wider-than-usual bars, a shorter-than-usual toptube, a skinnier-than-usual rear tire, machine-built wheels and even (gulp) Alienation rims. I am willing to endure all of these things in the name of science.

The big question, however, is which bike? I welcome your suggestions, either via comment or e-mail. The Kink and the FBM are tempting simply because they're legit "street" bikes similar to my own for the low, low cost of $500 (more or less the cost of my frame and fork). On the other hand, I like the idea of the Method Team because it's the top-of-the-line BMX bike from the biggest bike manufacturer in the world. More or less the polar opposite of a frame-up build from a rider-owned company. The Anti-Christ of bikes, as it were. Maybe I'd even leave the brake on. Either way, I'd be down to ride the bike for a year, keeping track of things the whole way through, from assembly to [possible] destruction. (We're talking weekly updates. Possibly with video and the occasional guest tester.)

Which leads to the final part of all this—I'd rather not pay retail if at all possible. I mean, I will if I have to (PayPal is at the ready), but if someone out there from a bike company or distributor or shop/mailorder is reading this and wants to help out, it would be appreciated. Just e-mail me at sprfls@gmail.com. I promise to settle on just one bike.

And look on the bright side. If this works out, I'll have no shortage of material. BMXfeed being down won't leave me high and dry.

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Four Pounds (To) Flat

You may or may not remember this. A few months ago, James "Triple Whip" Foster shattered his ankle jumping over a house in Germany for some TV show. The details about that can be found here. Obviously the problem was that his frame was too heavy.

So KHE lightened things up on his "Triple Threat" signature frame by butting everything (butted chainstays? Yikes.), milling out everything else, and heat-treating the whole mess. It's now four pounds even, so he should be able to float over houses from here on out. That's a relief.

Only there's this: Didn't FIVE-pound Sanko frames (think the Fit Hawk) have a nasty habit of breaking? What's going to happen to a FOUR-pound Sanko frame? I, for one, don't plan on finding out firsthand.

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So much here that I don't understand and/or don't want to accept.

a) Brian Tunney is working for ESPN now? Say what? Along with blogging for Dig, TMing éclat, doing Assblasters, and, you know, riding his bike? How does one fit all this in? I suppose I could e-mail him and ask, but after the last éclat cheap shot, I don't really feel like it. Besides, I don't even look at ESPN anymore since their video-heavy redesign appears to be incompatible with my not-up-to-the-minute operating system. So I doubt I'll be reading much. Especially if it's just going to be re-hashed press releases.

b) Metal is making frames in Taiwan? OK, I knew that. And I even understand it. Got nothing against overseas-made frames. Everyone's doing it anyway. So, yeah. Skip to c.

c) Chris Wilson got a signature frame? From Metal? After his Dead Bang part was more or less universally panned, I thought he'd be on Fit by now. He was the guy who did all the tailwhips, wasn't he?

d) Metal is making a frame that is described with phrases such as "low standover height," has a 75-degree headtube angle, and comes in a two-tone finish that isn't zebra-striped. This is like Slayer coming out with an album that is described with phrases such as "heartfelt and soulful." I find it funny that Metal splits from S&M, THEN puts out a frame, um, fit for Chase DeHart. Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't the whole point of there being different companies that companies be different? Guess not.

Fuck, now I'm depressed.

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